Dogs of Glory


If someone would pitch this song by Jim Steager to a megachurch, I’m pretty sure they’d go along with it.

It’s not like churches pay attention to lyrics, anyway… that’s how they end up with bland, boring songs that mention Jesus 32845492 times.

(Thanks to Todd for the link!)

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34 Responses

  1. avatar Jeff P Says:

    I want those 3 minutes back.

  2. avatar The Godless Monster Says:

    I think a few have already heard him.
    This is a serious song by a serious Christian.

  3. avatar alex Says:

    Where’s the punchline?…

  4. avatar kyrosion Says:

    Whyyyyyyyy?
    That was painful… even after spending 18 years of weekends listening to megachurch music >.<

  5. avatar Matt Says:

    Can’t they leave the furries alone?

  6. avatar billybee Says:

    keep this guy away from the kids.

  7. avatar Imani Says:

    That was seriously creepy.

  8. avatar Hybrid Says:

    Use it on terrorists… they’ll talk.

  9. avatar Kelley Says:

    dammit, Hemant this was painful. :|

  10. avatar Hermes Says:

    Well, according to the Catholic Church, that dog has no chance of getting communion. Next stop Hell? For that song, would that be justice or excessive malice?

    Source: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/7910177/Vicar-gives-Holy-Communion-to-dog.html

    Via: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/scienceblogs/pharyngula/~3/Y6sLrDHgi8E/because_even_the_moderate_libe.php

  11. avatar Raytheist Says:

    That’s just wrong.

  12. avatar Jude Says:

    The creepiest hymn I know is “Have thine own way, Lord” which continues, “Have thine own way. Thou art the potter, I am the clay. Mold me and make me after thy will, while I am waiting, yielded and still.” Creeped me out back when I sang it in choir; creeps me out now.

  13. avatar Vas Says:

    A promise better than a bone!?! The leash of love!?! Cherished prize!?!
    Man that is just creepy, thrust me on this one, I am a creep and I own a leash of love, I’ve even crucified some bitches now and then and I’m telling you this guy has me out creeped by a long shot, maybe it’s the make-up, or maybe just the whole sub for Jesus thing. I don’t know but one thing is for sure, that was just creepy!

  14. avatar Rich Wilson Says:
  15. avatar MH Says:

    That was creepy and funny.

  16. avatar Paul Says:

    Hemant, based on your comments, it seems you think this is some kind of satire. I’m sorry to inform you, it’s not. A true example of Poe’s law in action.

  17. avatar gwen Says:

    Poe..right? It HAS to be a Poe! Leave my dog ALONE! (and I want those three minutes back too!). Oh, my poor brain!!!

  18. avatar Orson Says:

    Gay dogs shouldn’t sing about Jesus.
    “Give a dog a bone” never sounded so blasphemous.

  19. avatar Eliza Says:

    I kept waiting for a line about lifting a leg to pass holy water or turning water into whine or SOMETHING satirical. Alas, HOWWWWWL, it was not to be.

  20. avatar BoomerChick Says:

    Dog is Not Great.

  21. avatar Apteryx Says:

    Some parts sounded a bit kinky… But mostly it was just creepy. This unquestioning devotion to anything at all? It doesn’t matter if god exists or not, that kind of submission just seems dangerous, where the hell is the safeword?

    And mentioning that the character he potrays can’t read but is still devoted to the bible because it’s apparently so awsome… I’ve read parts of it, and it is not awsome as far as I’ve gotten.

  22. avatar Simon Hembra Says:

    A song that mention’s Jesus 32,845,492 times? That’s one heck of a long church service.
    I’d be tempted to claim Poe’s law on this, but unfortunately, in my heart I know it’s real…

  23. avatar Bruce Meyer Says:

    The song is all wrong. You mentioned sin. Megachurch songs don’t mention sin. You’re confusing “praise and worship” songs with pentecostal-fundamentalist (i.e. OLD SCHOOL) stuff.
    How ya gonna get any street cred if ya can’t even get the accent right?

  24. avatar muggle Says:

    I was watching this thinking I’m not sure this is a Poe at all. Sounds like something Christians would do. And I see by the comments and Godless’ link, I’m right.

    I remember having a Hudson Brothers (yes, I’m admitting it) 45 back in the day and the flip side was some song that went, “G-O-D spells god, D-O-G spells dog; oh, Lord, they must be one and the same.” I always thought that irreverent and mocking and suddenly I’m not so sure. Had this back in high school and made damned sure my mother never heard it but I played it a lot even though that was the period wherein I was reading the buybull an hour a day. Hmmm, can I blame the Hudson Brothers for corrupting me?

  25. avatar NorDog Says:

    Creepy. Just very creepy.

  26. avatar CatBallou Says:

    That wasn’t nice, Hemant. I, too, kept waiting for the punchline.
    That man is creepy.

  27. avatar Todd Stiefel Says:

    The whole song can be summarized by its classic line, “If I could read, I would read the Bible”.

  28. avatar hoverfrog Says:

    That was weird.

  29. avatar Unholy Holly Says:

    I couldn’t watch it beyond a few verses. It felt like jeebus porn. Ewww.

  30. avatar T Ray Says:

    The first 16 seconds was too creepy. I had to stop it.

  31. avatar Barry Says:

    Hemant, it’s a good job there’s no such thing as hell because that song would be good grounds for the songwriter being sent there!

  32. avatar blueridgelady Says:

    Had to stop a minute and a half in. Sorry. I don’t get it, I guess.
    SCARY.

  33. avatar fritzy Says:

    “If I could read, I would read the Bible”.

    Well, at least then there’s a chance you might see your mythology for the putrid mess it is and wouldn’t be a christian in creepy face paint singing ghastly songs.

    BAD DOG!!!

  34. avatar shana Says:

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