Posted by Hemant Mehta in In response to the Atheist Bus Campaign ads, Ryan North and his dinosaurs offer a few suggestions for religious responses:
Incidentally, the title of the strip is:
where are the hindus with their “there’s probably many gods. now stop worrying and enjoy your lives.” buses? WHERE??
Would you like to suggest any other potential religious bus ad slogans?
(via Dinosaur Comics — Thanks to Mike and Tony for the link!)
Got Genesis?
.. I saw that somewhere recently.
Hemant, How ’bout this?
My holy book says it, so you better believe it. Now, stop complaining!
‘The way that is the way is probably not the way. Now stop worrying and enjoy your persimmon.’
Taoism FTW
Believe in Allah or we’ll blow this bus up.
Back when this country believed in Christian values, Negroes had to sit at the back of the bus.
My god has more arms than yours. Get over it, and enjoy your life.
Gods are like any other product – you get what you pay for. Would you like a personality test?
Do what thou wilt is the only rule. So enjoy your life. fnord
If I’m wearing a ‘turban’, I’m probably a Sikh, not a Muslim. Yes: I drink alcohol – you’re thinking about Muslims again.
There’s definitely only one god. He’s probably made up of 3 different entities. But that Johannine Comma is a bit dodgy.
I’d like to see an honest approach from the religious with;
“we have no way of knowing if there is a god, but if there is, we are certain we have picked the right one out of the thousands invented”.
or;
“religion; you better believe it because it’s the easiest way we have of making you do as we say”
or;
“hate gays? Religion gives you a socially acceptable excuse for being a bigot”
I felt that the point of the comic was to make light of the equivocal nature of the atheist bus slogan. The bus says “there is probably no god” (emphasis mine), making a slightly weaker statement than what people would expect. Ironically, making a weaker statement in a way makes for a stronger slogan, because it’s harder to disagree with. Jokes explained!
More slogan ideas:
“Almost all cultures have believed in a god, given a sufficiently broad definition of god”
“Religious community: The power of teamwork”
“Religion: Everyone is talking about it”
“The power of belief: Often strong enough to withstand contrary evidence”
“God is a pretty cool character who talks in all caps and bold to T-Rex sometimes, though only T-Rex can hear it.”
“Religion: Because the pursuit of knowledge (even in fruit form) takes work.”
“Religion: better than booze, cheaper than heroine, twice as addictive, just as destructive”
“In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is prophet”
“Praise the lord: eat meat” (meh, I’m not vegetarian, but I know some people would find it funny)
“Why living for a cause, when you can die for it?”
“Mine is bigger than yours: join the greatest faith in history”
“Why suffer a life of solitude, when you can be with your inner voices?”
“God: because growing out of your imaginary friends is for adults”
“Dress like a pirate, live like a pirate, fuck gravity”
Um… We don’t get it? I even asked my son and he doesn’t get it either because that one dino, according to him was not that big. Regardless, we don’t get it. (My son says, “WTF?”)
“Think about accepting Jesus as your savior!”
Picture a banner with broadswords, scimitars, battle axes, a rack, torture tongs, a person burning at the stake, a KKK hood, the Twin Towers burning, etc. Overlapping text says,
“Religion: Thousands of years of peace, love and good will.”
Here are parodies of some famous advertising slogans:
After Jesus, everything else is just toothpaste.
God: He keeps going and going and going and going…
Religion: I can’t believe I ate the whole thing.
Please don’t squeeze the Jeezus.
Salvation: Because you’re worth it.
Religion: The ultimate driving machine. (picture of flagellants whipping themselves)
Church: We make money the old fashioned way. We beg for it.
How do you spell relief? (picture of Jesus on the cross)
Religion: Don’t leave home without it.
We’re number two; we try harder. (picture of Muslim imam)
God: It’s the real thing!
Is it live, or is it Jesus?
Snap, Crackle, Pop (picture of hell)
Religion: It’s everywhere you want to be.
Religion: Live in your world, play in ours.
Religion: When it absolutely, positively has to be there forever.
Once you pop you just can’t stop. (picture of Eve handing Adam an apple)
You too can have a body like mine. (picture of Jesus risen)
With a name like Zoroastrianism, it has to be good.
Between love and madness lies religion.
A mind is a terrible thing to waste. Do it at your local church!
Religion: Sometimes you feel like a nut, sometimes you don’t.
Religion: So easy a caveman can do it.
There’s probably no escape from Cthulhu. Now stop enjoying your life and worry.
Epistaxis:
That’s got to be the best one ever.
Still a believer? Try out thinking!
If you have to use fear of eternal punishment to coerce people into believing something, it’s probably unnatural and unhealthy.
“Climate change is a hoax!
sea levels are rising because Jesus is crying!”