Nice to know the story has come to a happy ending.

It can be seriously scary. You can never predict how someone will react, even someone you think you know very well. I’m really happy that our friend and his wife are able to talk with each other about their beliefs respectfully, and without becoming defensive.

I was talking with a woman at one of our atheist meet ups recently who was religious when she married her husband, and is now an atheist. She is having a much harder time than this, her husband is extremely angry. I told her I hoped it all worked out for the best, but I didn’t see much hope for that relationship. Of course, that could be because I sought out someone to share my life with who also shared my world views…

And people roll their eyes at me when I compare being an atheist to being gay. You could replace the word in this post and it would echo a lot of gay “coming out” events.

I was thinking basically the same thing, of course coming out as gay to an opposite gendered spouse would be much more traumatic (a same gendered spouse would presumably be underwhelmed by the announcement), but I think it sounds a lot like many gay people’s experiences coming out to friends and family.

his employers will be more shocked at his dishonesty than at his lack of faith, and with good reason.

Excellent point. There is a cost involved in delaying the inevitable. The longer the deception goes on the more hurt it will cause. *said Polly, while pointing a finger at himself*

The problem is that I will never be able to come out to my family, especially my mother. I was raised Baptist and my mother would feel real suffering because she would TRULY believe that I’d burn in hell forever, regardless of how untrue or true that is. She’s a kind person and has always loved me so I keep it to myself for her sake. She believes that god has put her family right where it is and that she is blessed, etc.
We recently had an accident and she was injured. Even I felt gratitude it wasn’t worse than it was. Mostly it shocked me into realizing she is -actually- mortal. I love her very much and just feel that her not suffering is worth more than me being “out”. She knows I am very liberal to begin with but I think this would push her over the top.

I was in his position myself few years ago, but my wife didn’t take it well. Things are getting better and I’m a lot happier now.