03.18.08
Friendly Atheist Contest #21: New Catholic Sins
Last week, I ran this contest:
What other “sins” will the Catholic Church condemn?
Here are the Top 5 responses (with submitters)!
5|
Back sassin’ His Holiness.
(Renacier)
4|
Emoticons.
… The emoticon is another symptom of the degradation and increasing secularism of society. It is beneath God, and it is beneath his faithful.
(Brett)
3|
Google Abuse (thou shalt not google more than 3 times per day)
2|
No more making fun of the Popemobile. It’s not a lack of faith. We finally admit it - God just can’t stop bullets.
(Rest)
1|
Virginity. But only in boys under 18.
(Jodie)
Congratulations to the winners! The top three will be receiving specially-made Friendly Atheist wristbands (in the color of their choice), sent to me by blog reader Shauna and her sister Danni!
…
If you’d like to win your own wristband, here is the new contest:
If religions were fonts, what fonts would they be and why…?
Funny and creative answers will have a shot at winning.
Good luck!
Technorati Tags: atheist, atheism, contest
Popularity: 2% [?]
Wasyl said,
March 18, 2008 at 2:21 pm
Catholicism would be You’re Going to Hell-vetica
Godless Geek said,
March 18, 2008 at 2:22 pm
Wingdings - It says a lot, but none of it makes any sense.
Evolved said,
March 18, 2008 at 2:31 pm
Comic Sans, because it represents the intellectual level of mose religious doctrines and is a fundie troll cult favorite!
ash said,
March 18, 2008 at 2:33 pm
doesn’t matter AS LONG AS IT’S WRITTEN IN CAPS
Epistaxis said,
March 18, 2008 at 2:47 pm
Times New Roman 12 pt, because it’s what they were given by default and they’ve never thought about other options.
TheElectricMonk said,
March 18, 2008 at 3:13 pm
but catholics are already wingdings…
Perfect Fool said,
March 18, 2008 at 4:06 pm
I’m going with MT (monotype) Symbol.
Say it out loud: “M.T. Symbol.”
HM said,
March 18, 2008 at 4:26 pm
The font for Scientology would be Times Extra New Roman, which they promise is newer and better than all the old fonts, costs $10,000, but ends up looking exactly the same.
(Please don’t sue me.)
Helie L said,
March 18, 2008 at 4:34 pm
Arial.
Because a big bureaucracy ripped it off a popular font (Helvetica), like the Catholic Church ripped off pagan traditions.
John Pritzlaff said,
March 18, 2008 at 4:40 pm
Arial Narrow-Minded
Derek said,
March 18, 2008 at 4:55 pm
Chinese, because if you don’t have it installed, none of it makes any sense.
-or if it’s okay to restate someone else’s-
Wingdings, because for some reason there’s more than one, and no one is actually sure of what they really mean.
To be fair, Wingdings is the obvious answer.
Darwin's Dagger said,
March 18, 2008 at 6:56 pm
Courier, a font based on an obsolete technology (typewriters).
Viggo the Carpathian said,
March 18, 2008 at 6:58 pm
Stencil - The generic font for all religions
Traditional Arabic - Islam, for obvious reasons
Freestyle Script - Unitarians
Papyrus - Judaism (Ok, weak but what you gonna do)
Comic Sans - Baptists (Have you been to one recently… I mean really)
FangSong (yes, its a real font) - Snake handling Baptists
Kevin M said,
March 18, 2008 at 7:03 pm
Book Antiqua
Ashes said,
March 18, 2008 at 7:09 pm
Century Schoolbook, in honour of all their attempts to keep modern schoolbooks filled with 1st century A.D. ideas.
Greta Christina said,
March 18, 2008 at 8:03 pm
Fundamentalism has to be Book Antiqua. For obvious reasons.
And Scientologists are Zapf Dingbats. For what I hope are also obvious reasons.
Jeff said,
March 18, 2008 at 9:43 pm
Courier new because as with the font, every passage in the bible has equal weight for the fundamentalists regardless of how obviously the passage merely is a product of the man-made culture of the time.
Evolved said,
March 18, 2008 at 9:45 pm
Comic Sans Brain.
It describes theistards to a T!
Rest said,
March 18, 2008 at 10:27 pm
I just want to give a big shout out to God for giving me the comedic talent to win the last contest. To those who lost, I guess you just didn’t pray hard enough. Keep trying!
Rest
boo said,
March 19, 2008 at 12:54 am
Times Old Roman - because there’s nothing like some good ol’ fashioned human sacrifice, child boinking and lead poisoning induced brain tumors.
Greta Christina said,
March 19, 2008 at 2:44 am
Oh, yeah.
One more.
It’s not a religion… but atheism is Futura.
Justanotheratheist said,
March 19, 2008 at 7:44 am
If it’s a church that believes in glossolalia, you know they’re speaking in Tunga.
Oh, and I once new a former nun turned hedonist who ran a strip club called Our Lady of Perpetua Titling.
Paineroo said,
March 19, 2008 at 5:58 pm
Times New Roman Catholic - Important letters wear a mitre in the form of a 15pt caret.
The Reverend said,
March 19, 2008 at 8:40 pm
A new type would need to be invented for christian religions:
baptismal font!
pip said,
March 20, 2008 at 9:15 pm
mangal: because Christians mangle logic and reasoning at every turn when they try to defend their beliefs.
trebuchet MS: because Christians need something akin to a catapult to keep making those leaps of faith every day of their lives.
Alyx said,
March 21, 2008 at 8:01 pm
Just a few I came up with (I hope it’s not too many :/ )…
Scientology – AvantGarde
Satanism – Century Gothic
Baptism – Georgia
Buddhism – Microsoft Himalaya
Mennonite – Goudy Old Style
Fundamentalism – Zapf Dingbats
Judaism – David or Miriam
Evangelism - Perpetua
Jehovah’s Witness - Courier (because they sometimes go door to door on bicycles, and bicycle messengers carry courier bags…yes, it was a stretch…)
Islam – Arabic Typesetting
Catholicism – Constantia
What would atheism be? MS Reference Specialty or Rockwell Extra Bold (becuase atheism rocks and is extra bold, plus Christians especially like to reference it as being evil)
Hehe…this was fun…although I’ll admit I spent waaay too much time on it…
Friendly Atheist » Friendly Atheist Contest #22: Religious Fonts said,
April 2, 2008 at 7:00 pm
[…] week, I ran this contest: If religions were fonts, what fonts would they be and […]